“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.”
—Melody Beattie
On this 10th anniversary of the attacks of September 11, 2001 the word that keeps coming back to me is “arise.”
I’m surprised that this is the word that that hits home. But after watching too may YouTube tributes, and too many commemorative specials on TV, and shedding too many tears for lives lost, familes shattered, and dreams unrealized, it is the word that comes.
It really shouldn’t take an earthquake – or a hurricane – for us to stop and take stock of what really matters.
But it seems in our go-go-go microwave society it literally does take an act of God to shove us out of the blur of everyday obligations and make us pause long enough to look around – really look around – and figure out what matters to us.
The question is – did we heed the lesson. And if we did, will it last past Monday?
There’s an old saying that says something like, “If you want to make God laugh, tell Him what your plans are.”
There’s been a bit of that going on around here lately and it has provided me a tremendous opportunity to literally practice what I preach.
Four weeks ago my fiance, who was then living and working in another state, lost his job. He was the #2 guy in a non-profit organization that brought in a new #1 – and a month later – Poof! #2 job is eliminated.
THAT was not the plan.
The PLAN – my plan- was that we’d manage a bi-state marriage, (not ideal but it was norm for us). His more than adequate income would help him save for his retirement, pay down debt, and help two of his three adult daughters with the expenses for their upcoming weddings. We’d see each other on weekends as we have been and talk 5 times a day on the phone.
Within a week’s time everything changed. And while the stress of the change has been quite profound, I’ve been challenging myself to see God’s provision at every turn.
When news came of the layoff, I told him: we are going to get an awesome opportunity to put our faith where our mouths are. He and I are often play the roles of “spiritual encouragers” for our friends and family members who are going through difficult circumstances. My job as a pastoral coach puts me in the center of a lot of unhappy or challenging times for people. I like to think that the perspective I bring to those circumstances provides hope and healing for the people with whom I’m journeying.
Can I do that for someone whose pain, difficulty, and trials very closely impact me? Can we both see God’s provision in even these trying times? I hope so.
Can I – can we – quite literally practice what we preach?
Here’s what I’ve seen so far:
1. This layoff provides him an opportunity to move back to where his daughters and me and my kids live.
2. The job market here is pretty strong, even for those at an “executive” level of experience.
3. He was supposed to have to pay 2 months rent on his 60-day notice of lease termination of his home. In less than a week his landlord called and asked him if he could vacate within 2 days – and get back the paid rent. A savings of a couple thousand dollars.
4. The truck rental company that he used to move his stuff only charged him for one day instead of the three days he had the truck.
5. Car insurance where I live is half of what it was where he used to live.
6. My basement functions quite well as a modest apartment.
7. The interest rate on my mortgage resets on July 1 and will cut my house payments in half. At least for the next year.
Some people might look at this modest list and say, “Harrumph! Just coincidence.” But you see, I don’t believe in coincidence. I believe that when you look at things with the eyes of faith, your perspective changes. Your vision expands to include the horizon of hope. You are encouraged — even in the midst of trials and challenges.
And I am giddy with excitment. God is moving. I don’t know in what way yet, and that is ok. I don’t need to know. What I do need to do is trust. Trust in a God who loves His creation – who promises that He knows the plans He has for us – plans to prosper and not to harm (Jeremiah 29:11). I don’t need to understand it. I do need to have faith and believe. (Hebrews 11:1).
It was a Grand Slam Sermon at Mass today. I even took the time to tell our priest, Father Richardson, that he delivered on of the best sermons I’ve heard in my life.
The subject was TRUST.
The sermon was based on today’s Gospel (John 9:1-41) – the story about Jesus restoring the sight of the blind man after applying a paste of mud and saliva to his eyes. We were reminded that “back in the day” any Jew who was touched by the bodily fluid of another was considered defiled (hence people spitting on Jesus during his trial and the walk to Calvary were really mocking and degrading Him).
“They got what they deserved.”
Everyone of us has probably thought that about at least one person in our lives. It usually has a negative connotation to it – like when the bully in class finally gets his due, or the slacker co-worker gets fired.
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I was at the gym the the other day, sweating up a storm on the stairmaster, when my attention was caught by the “hill climber” profile I’d chosen for that workout.
It was like a LiteBrite display of triangles. The left upward slope representing the hard climb to the top, and the right dowward slope indicating an ease of tension and effort on the “downhill” slope.
As I struggled against the resistance of the “up hill” climbs and breathed easier on the “down hill side” I realized the experience of my workout was a terrific metphor for life.
Think about it, if every day was a “mountain top experience” we’d have no appreciation for how amazing it is to be on top of a mountain looking out on the wonders above and below. It is the striving and the effort that make attaining that mountain top experience so special. And the down hill slopes — sometimes those are the good times laced with lovely reflective thoughts of the mountaintop. And sometimes the downhills are harder on us than the climb to the top.
All of this is to say – we can’t live our lives on top of the mountain peak. I see mountaintop experiences as the reward for the hard work – the goal in the race – the “atta boy” for a job well done.
Life is lived on the ascents to and the descents from the mountaintop.
Our choice is to make each leg of the journey as purposeful and joyful as the attainment of the mountaintop.
When we are willing to let the valleys teach us as much as the peaks – then we know we are living fully – and with intention.Â
The richness of THAT kind of existence is beyond measure.
I received this beautiful piece via email from a friend. I don’t know who the original author is. I have often spoken about life as a tapestry. When you look at it from the back, it’s a mess, but only when seen complete and from the front do you see how all the individual threads run together. I was reminded of this when I read the below story — how oftentimes we get so caught up in the struggles and trials that we forget God is the Master weaver who takes it all and can make it beautiful if we let him. (Romans 8:28)
~~The Quilt Holes~~~
As I faced my Maker at the last judgment, I knelt before the Lord along with all the other souls.
Before each of us laid our lives like the squares of a quilt in many piles; an angel sat before each of us sewing our quilt squares together into a tapestry that is our life.
But as my angel took each piece of cloth off the pile, I noticed how ragged and empty each of my squares was. They were filled with giant holes. Each square was labeled with a part of my life that had been difficult, the challenges and temptations I was faced with in everyday life. I saw hardships that I endured, which were the largest holes of all.
I glanced around me. Nobody else had such squares. Other than a tiny hole here and there, the other tapestries were filled with rich color and the bright hues of worldly fortune. I gazed upon my own life and was disheartened.
My angel was sewing the ragged pieces of cloth together, threadbare and empty, like binding air.
Finally the time came when each life was to be displayed, held up to the light, the scrutiny of truth. The others rose; each in turn, holding up their tapestries. So filled their lives had been. My angel looked upon me and nodded for me to rise.
My gaze dropped to the ground in shame. I hadn’t had all the earthly fortunes. I had love in my life and laughter. But there had also been trials of illness and wealth, and false accusations that took from me my world, as I knew it. I had to start over many times. I often struggled with the temptation to quit, only to somehow muster the strength to pick up and begin again. I spent many nights on my knees in prayer, asking for help and guidance in my life. I had often been held up to ridicule, which I endured painfully, each time offering it up to the Father in hopes that I would not melt within my skin beneath the judgmental gaze of those who unfairly judged me.
And now, I had to face the truth. My life was what it was, and I had to accept it for what it was.
I rose and slowly lifted the combined squares of my life to the light.
An awe-filled gasp filled the air. I gazed around at the others who stared at me with wide eyes.
Then, I looked upon the tapestry before me. Light flooded the many holes, creating an image, the face of Christ. Then our Lord stood before me, with warmth and love in His eyes. He said, ‘Every time you gave over your life to Me, it became My life, My hardships, and My struggles.
Each point of light in your life is when you stepped aside and let Me shine through, until there was more of Me than there was of you.’
~~~~~~May all our quilts be threadbare and worn, allowing Christ to shine through!
I bought the book Real Magic: Creating Miracles in Everyday Life by Wayne Dwyer at least 3 years ago when I went on a buying binge in Barnes & Noble. The book, written in 1992, has sat unread on that same plastic shelf I put it on the day it came home from the store. One of my new year’s resolutions is to read the books I have purchased over the years – those collecting dust since they were bought. Real Magic was in the middle of such a stack, no more or less prominent than any of the other titles. Frankly, I can’t remember WHY I bought it. I’m sure it had something to do with the sub-title of creating miracles in everyday life. I do believe miracles are around us every day if we only take the time to stop and appreciate them.
Among the first pages of the book Dwyer notes an ancient Zen saying: “When the student is ready, the teacher appears.”
I’m ready for this book now.
It is about becoming more in tune with your spiritual self and living a life of service and love and purpose. In my interpretation: tuning into the Holy Spirit and God’s plan for your life. Dwyer has many detractors and tends to use some new age language, but so far in my reading he recognizes prayer as prayer, God as God, and the indwelling power of the soul and spirit. Some who prescribe to strict dogma might be offended by how he writes. I am only on the second chapter, but I am seeing themes here that I’ve read before by mainstream Christian authors, and so far, I have been inspired to dig a little deeper into my own “stuff.” A little self-soul-examination never hurt anyone.
Most of you who’ve spent any time on this blog know that I believe the negative effects of anger, bitterness, and unforgiveness include the inability to love well, experience real happiness, joy, or success. Anger and bitterness are poisons that corrode us from the inside, they ruin relationships, and yes — they can kill you. That said I want to share this particular passage from Real Magic (p. 72).
“To move past anger and bitterness, in your mind isolate one person such as you feel has wronged you at some time in your life, someone who has not repaid a long overdue debt. Perhaps an ex-spouse who left or abused you in some way, a parent or a long-lost love who jilted you. Isolate this one person in your thoughts. Now, just for a few moments, instead of feeling hate and bitterness, try to imagine yourself sending them love. Try to grasp the idea they came into your life to help you learn a lesson, and no matter how painful the lesson, they showed up in your life for a purpose. When you are able to send them love instead of hate, you will not only be healing yourself, you will be on your way to becoming a spiritual person.
Think of a wrong done to you as being like a snake bite. When you are bitten by a snake there are two sources of pain. One is the bite itself, which cannot be unbitten. It happened, it hurt and you have the mark to prove it. You then go on from there and learn how to avoid snakes in your life. The second source of the pain is the venom that is now circulating through you. This is the killer. No one has ever died from a snake bite – it is the aftershock of the venom circulating in the body that is fatal. So it is with hatred and forgiveness. The event happened. It cannot unhappen in your physical world. But the killer is the hatred and anger that continue to circulate in your system like venom, long after the bite wound has healed and disappeared. You and only you, have the power to send that killer venom out of you; that it is still present within you is your choice. Remember the sage words of Buddha,’You will not be punished for your anger; you will be punished by your anger.’ Miracle making is impossible to experience when your insides are poisoned by bitterness toward others.”
“Miracle making” in Dwyer’s interpretation is related to self empowerment and self realization. For me, it is really our own ability to tune into our God-given strengths and the power of the Holy Spirit to align and achieve God’s purpose for our lives. And I know he is correct. You CANNOT find peace and your purpose when you are poisoned by anger and bitterness.
I’m not asking you to buy into Dwyer’s philosophy – or by his book- but I encourage you to take this challenge. Imagine one person for whom you harbor anger, bitterness, resentment. Hate.
Let it go.
Hold a positive thought about that person. Imagine embracing them. .. Let the poison of anger and bitterness leave your body and mind.
In a microwave society like ours, waiting is a bad word.
Fast food dinners. Instant messaging. Rapid response strategies. Express delivery.
I want it. Now.